Self Hatred

Hmm, .....the idea that there is something like a `perfect world, perfect behaviour, perfect me` is quite common in the West.
As nobody can live up to it, he might end up in self-hatred.

In the East, as far as I can see from nearly 20 years experience, the idea that something could or should be perfect does not exist.

Everything, in its quite messy state, is fine already so where would any self- or other-loathing come from ?

Tamara

I'm not sure I understand.

Hate is one of the unwholesome roots of motivation, as is greed, and in societies where the sense of self-worth is measured in ruthless competition and owning externals, "beating-oneself-up" is considered an acceptable motivating force. Self-hate, neurotic compassion, self-pity, are energies feeding the ego and not traveling on the compassion pathway. In societies living closer to the web of nature, cooperation and communal harmony are more valued.

I think you're right on about a lot of things. I would agree that Christianity has contributed to some sort of compulsion to feel inadequate without the redemption of some higher power. I disagree that Christianity is a retarded religion, as I feel you are only focusing on the most negative aspects of it. Similar things could be said about negative aspects of any religion. I don't want to offend anyone here, so I won't get into it, but there are strange rules and practices in many sects of Buddhism that would likely knock you back on your seat, and have virtually nothing to do with anything Buddha ever taught. People tend to screw things up when it comes to religion.

I also think that in the U.S., we're constantly reminded of our inadequacy, because that's what makes the economy function. If we're fat, we need to get a gym membership or go on a diet. If we're skinny, we need muscle builder. New clothes, cars, etc... Marketers' goal is to make you feel like you need their product because it will complete you in some way. And advertising is everywhere (even on this website). I don't think I realized how much we are bombarded with these messages of inadequacy until I left the country for a couples months over the winter.

Also, I think our self-hatred starts in school. In American schools, we're so sensitive to fostering good self-esteem that it ends up hurting kids. We're constantly asked "who am I?", "what do I like?", "what is my favorite color?", "what is my favorite TV show?", "what do I want to be when I grow up..." We are constantly asked to define ourselves and put these different labels on ourselves. This focus on the self creates a sense of isolation from others and gives us a very shaky sense of self-esteem that is entirely dependent upon meeting our own individual needs.Therefore, if we don't have something, we're not whole in some way. When self-esteem is dependent on making our selves happy, that's a pretty heavy burden to carry around all the time, because it's simply not possible. Also, I think it causes people to become more rigid in their views. "I'm a republican" "I'm a democrat" "I'm pro gay marriage" "I'm against gay marriage" etc..........

graham wrote

I also think that in the U.S., we're constantly reminded of our inadequacy, because that's what makes the economy function.

That's a good point graham. It's consumer capitalism. We always need to fix things and make em better.

I also think self hatred develops in alienation from others. Maybe we compare ourselves too much, born out of envy. It is kind of foolish to feel self loathing the more you think about it. Hating yourself is the stupidest thing in the world.

I can be overly critical of Christianity. Yet there are some very good aspects to it such as charity, a sense of community and some teachings of Jesus. Buddhism can stray from the Middle Way in certain countries which is more superstitous rather than enlightening.

I love Ghandi's quote..."I like your Christ but Christians are so unlike your Christ." It goes something like that. Everybody loves Jesus of course, he is very charismatic and cuddly. Except when he gets mad and tells you to hate your family, forsake all your belongings and follow him into the apocalypse.

Buddha is the guru who reigns over all. He is more worthy of veneration and supplication than any other teacher who ever existed. Lao Tzu and Confuscious were very wise too.
It seems the Asian mind comprehended much more than any European in the sense of true spirituality.

It is kind of a racial thing, born out of the environment and evolution. I know that world peace is the ultimate goal which seems to not be talked about or mentioned much anymore. It seems that people have given up on the thought of world peace. I used to hear it as a kid but now it seems like a cliche. I think a big reason is because peace isn't good for business. War creates more profit. The military-industrial complex needs to blow things up and destroy people's lives so that we can fix em and make em better.

It's just that the idea of Christianity works so well with this capitalistic methodology of implementing the disease so that a remedy can be sold. The preacher, the salesman, tells you that you are flawed, and that you need God or this holy product and henceforth you will be saved (enslaved). So clever and subversive that it easily slips under the radar of normal awareness. That's how a devil's hand works.

Buddhism doesn't sell you anything, except whatever you may wish to purchase by choice. Yet Christianity demands that you buy into it with your heart and soul for your very salvation depends upon it. Disbelief equals damnation......and acquiescence equals acceptence into the pearly gates.

Christianity has always been most useful for propagandists, conquerors and rulers. Yet ironically not very effective at creating any lasting peace. Where Christianity has failed, Buddhism can succeed. But that's just my personal strong belief.